Monday, September 14, 2009

Finding Your Voice.

We all have one. That instrument we use to express how we feel or what we're thinking, to stand up for what we believe in and to share love and stories with one another. Our voice. With it we set ourselves apart from everyone else and truly become who we are...or who we want to be.

During this year long project, I have not only worked on my songs to get them to where they need to be, but my own voice as well. I'm not talking about being able to hit that falsetto in Horizons, even though I have been working hard to find it, but more like who I am and what I have to say. My voice has always needed working on; for many years I have always had a hard time saying what I really feel and what is on my mind. Well, that's not entirely true. I've always been really open about what worries me or what scares me (been called a worry-wart all my life). It's when it comes to speaking my mind about what I truly believe to be right, wrong or unjustified is where I've had a problem. My mom had it in her, my grandfather surely did it definitely is in my blood to be a bit bolder. Somewhere along the way, however, I decided it was more important for everyone to get along with me than it was to be real with them. Don't get me wrong, I am a nice person (I have been told) but I have "lacked a backbone" in my life; a heavy foot to put down when something isn't right or makes me feel threatened. It's not a good thing to have so many footprints all over you from years of being walked on. Somewhere along the way you have to stand up so that doesn't happen. After all, people can't walk up.

I'm not saying I'm a rude jerk or anything. But I think over the last year or so, I have found a different voice, perhaps the one that my mom would have handed down to me had she not passed away when I was too young to know any better. I'm proud to be more like her everyday though I know I have a long way to go. (She once stopped an elevator with a coworker in it to tell her to stop treating her the way she was. hahaha)

Now that was a voice to be reckoned with!

On the musical side of things, I'm working with some concepts for "my voice" to get it so it's not as strained sounding in certain songs. Horizons, for example, may not sound exactly like you have all heard in the demos. Dave has told me that it might be more effective to use my more softer, breathier voice like in Electric Candle and Bicycle on the Ice in some parts of Horizons, namely the verses. We'll see how it all works out but I'm excited to find out.

Feel free to voice your opinions on that ;) I'm all ears.

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